Twists and Turns

I can hear their voices very clearly now: "Nathan, you ridiculous bastard," the voices say, "who do you think you are, smoking your pipe like that in some foreign cafe, writing as if you are some sort of tortured genius that has yet to be discovered by the world!" To these voices I reply, "you are very right to mock me, I am in no way tortured, and I do believe that the world already knows precisely how magnificent I am!"

As you may be able to tell by my town, my tryst with Tunisia is going splendidly. In spite of the loss of our young spritely ward Harold, my plot for restoring my nefarious empire is proceeding without delay. After posing as a tourist in a hotel at the beautiful sidi bou said, I befriended the owner who agreed to allow me to use his home as a temporary headquarters. Harold was our translator, so due to his untimely demise I can only assume that my host's constant yelling and pointing out of the door to his house is a cry of encouragement for me to go forth into the world and reclaim my former glory! I shall become so mighty that America will come begging on her knees for me to return!

My first major excursion brought me to the ancient city of Carthage, where I searched for forgotten secrets of unfathomable power, long lost to the dusty annals of antiquity. It was a perilous journey, but with the help of some new found comrades, not even the mystical and arcane traps of a once mighty civilization could stop me! After I translated the runes of the lost language my quaint companions insisted was "Arabic", I discovered that a local merchant was selling artifacts of great power. One in particular granted me the power of invisibility, all for the low price of 30 dinars! What fool would try to sell this relic as a keychain for such a measly price?! I have clearly refined my bartering skills enough to proceed to the Medina Souq in search of greater fortune. (Me, being invisible. Can you see me? Of course not!)

I must confess that the market provided me with an even greater challenge. The entire region is built like a massive labyrinth: truly fitting for a great Mediterranean city. At every corner, merchants instantly detected my greatness and implored me to grace their shops with my presence. I devoted my full attention to the magnificent architecture in search of ancient clues in the style of epic and timeless novels of Dan Brown. Although I was in full control of my surroundings at every moment, it was because of my intense symboligizing that, to the untrained eye, it would appear that I was hopelessly lost and unable to function. I assure you, however, that this was not the case. Although I was not able to find any object worthy of purchase on my first trip, I noticed a pattern that may change the course of my journey and indeed the course of all history!

There are three objects described in the lost books of the bible which I studied during my brief tenure as a boy-genius professor at Harvard. These objects are drums, food, and revealing dresses used in fertility dances. These symbols were clearly situated on a map of the Medina in the shape of a triangle. The word "Triangle" spelled backwards is "Elgnairt", which starts with the letter "E". From here on, my description becomes very technical and academic, so pay close attention: If you turn the letter "E" on its side, it kind of looks like the letter "M". Can you see where this is headed? The word "Magic" starts with the letter M! If I can harness the powers of Tunisian drumming, cooking and dance, I will be able to gain magical powers! It is all clearly spelled out in the symbologies! My power will become so great, that even the dark and mystical "Kyle Anne" will be put to shame. I will begin my new quest as soon as possible, and keep you updated on the results!It's okay if you can't see the symbols. I'm a professional.